. . . Thursday May 27, 2004

When Thong Means Wrong

The latest legislative and cultural crisis to hit the Big Apple is a heated debate over the sale of previously worn lingerie and underwear. For example: Someone wears a thong once or twice (or just tries it on in the store), returns it, and then store associates put the used and worn item right back on the sales rack.

The legal debate grew out of a television news piece suggesting that such resales are par for the course at major department stores. A Macy’s spokesperson countered (lesson: never be the one to answer a reporter’s question about underwear, it’s a no-win): “We train our associates to inspect the merchandise upon return and if in salable condition, return it to the sales floor. Any items that are soiled … are not returned to the floor.”

This sounds like some bizarre offshoot of the Patriot Act.

If we can’t soil our underwear and still get full value when we bring it back to the store, haven’t the terrorists already won?

Concentration is important!