. . . Monday March 29, 2004

Clarke, Who Goes There?

Discrediting Richard Clarke has become the number one pastime among White House backers. So far, not many of the attacks have worked. But there are plenty more to come. Here’s a preview of the things you may be hearing about Clarke in the near future.

His hair is a natural gray. But it’s not his natural gray.

He’s gay.

He’s looking forward to Matt LeBlanc’s Friends spinoff.

In January of 2001 Clarke mentioned Al Qaeda to Condoleezza Rice and later said that “her facial expression gave me the impression she had never heard the term before.” That expression was actually meant to convey that Clarke needed a mint.

He still eats carbs.

Clarke wants to take your guns away, raise your taxes, leave your family and neighbors open to attack, coddle terrorists, take orders from the French, and he snowboards like a girl … oh wait a second, that’s John Kerry.

Reason to be disgruntled? I’ll say. He was the only bureaucrat within 13,000 miles of Washington that hadn’t yet been given a nickname (or a towel-flicking) by W.

Let’s put it this way: That was no wardrobe malfunction.

Clarke? That’s a Muslim name isn’t it? …

In truth, we really need look no further than Clarke’s own testimony to discredit him. Take a look at his remarks below (edited for distribution by the White House):

“And I failed you.”

“…certainly no higher priority.”

“I believe the Bush administration in the first eight months considered terrorism an important issue, but … I failed you.”

“I thought cybersecurity was and I still think cyber security is an extraordinary important issue for which this country is very underprepared. And I thought perhaps I could make a contribution if I worked full time on that issue … And I failed you.”

“I don’t know…”

“But the investigation, both the CIA investigation and the FBI investigation, made it very clear in ’95 and ’96 as they got more information, that the Iraqi government was … way involved in the attack.”

“Senator Kerry … one of my best friends and someone who I greatly respect”

“I do know he was thereafter continually informed about the threat by George Tenet … And I failed you.”

“I thought fine. If you want to have that kind standard and you want to have that kind of process, fine.”

” It is unusual when you are being told every day that there is an urgent threat.”

“And the president makes these kinds of decisions.”

“I don’t think it’s a question of morality at all. I think it’s a question of politics.”

“… We succeeded in stopping the attacks. That was good news.”

“… there is a difference between what I said to this commission in 15 hours of testimony and what I am saying in my book.”

“And, yes, I will admit, I co-teach a class at the Harvard University and Georgetown University with Mr. Beers. That, I … think, makes me a member of the Kerry campaign.”

“I failed you … yes, that’s correct … I failed you.”

Concentration is important!